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Woman warned NOT to continue with her obese new partner because they can’t have sex

A woman was told to break up with her “smart and nice” boyfriend because of his size after revealing that he is extremely obese and had trouble having sex the first time they tried.

The British woman, in her mid-thirties, went to the parenting forum mumsnet to explain that he is a ‘really great guy’ but that he has several minor health issues and that his weight was affecting the ‘mechanics of sex’.

She added that he appeared to have “buried penis syndrome,” a medical condition in which skin and fat obscure a normal-sized penis, making it appear smaller or less visible.

Because she wants to have children in the future with a partner who takes care of their health, she wondered if it was unfair to keep dating him in the hopes that he would change.

The reactions to the post were divided, some advised her to end the relationship because of her dreams of becoming a mother, while others argued obesity shouldn’t be a deal breaker.

An anonymous woman, from the UK, has sparked a debate about being in a relationship with a partner who cannot have physical intimacy because of her weight (file image)

An anonymous woman, from the UK, has sparked a debate about being in a relationship with a partner who cannot have physical intimacy because of her weight (file image)

In a post on Mumsnet, the woman explained that she couldn't have sex with her partner, who has many minor illnesses, because his weight made it a struggle.

In a post on Mumsnet, the woman explained that she couldn't have sex with her partner, who has many minor illnesses, because his weight made it a struggle.

In a post on Mumsnet, the woman explained that she couldn’t have sex with her partner, who has many minor illnesses, because his weight made it a struggle.

In the first post, the woman explained that she had been dating for a while hoping to find a partner to have children with, but she couldn’t deny the “real chemistry” she had with her current partner.

While she described him as “incredibly smart, kind, competent, interesting, warm and sexy,” she went on to say that he is “not just a few stones above” his BMI range.

The woman in question went on to say how his weight, which she didn’t disclose, plus his minor illnesses, affected the “mechanics of sex.”

She continued: “We struggled with it and in the end didn’t do it. That’s maybe what made me realize this could be a problem, I guess.

This has absolutely nothing to do with attraction, I think it’s beautiful and I’m definitely not a fat basher. I myself have had a lot of weight problems related to medication and at one point was size 18-20. I still have something to lose.’

She made it clear that she’s “not looking for a perfected type of gym”, but is concerned about mobility, adding: “It would just be ideal if he was a healthier weight as I have the long term in mind. and I don’t know if it’s fair. to keep seeing him with that in mind.’

The woman wrote a series of follow-up posts revealing that her partner appears to have buried penile syndrome

The woman wrote a series of follow-up posts revealing that her partner appears to have buried penile syndrome

The woman wrote a series of follow-up posts revealing that her partner appears to have buried penile syndrome

Many comments on the post advised the woman not to continue the relationship, arguing that her partner should focus on trying to lose the excess weight instead of dating.

“If he’s so obese that he’s unable to have sex, then it’s really a non-starter,” one wrote. “He’ll know it’s his weight that keeps him from having sex and yet he hasn’t mentioned anything to do with wanting to lose weight or anything…”

They went on to say that there is “no easy way to bring it up,” so they suggested telling him that the relationship “isn’t really working.”

Another commented similarly: “I’m surprised he’s dating and not taking the time to take care of himself and fix his shit. Why does he wait for someone else to solve his problems? He is considerably overweight, why? Does he also have psychological problems?

“We all have health problems as we get older – but this is something else – it affects his ability to have a love/sex life and he doesn’t seem to be bothered by that?”

A third added: “I would definitely not like a man who is very overweight and who has not tried to lose weight at all, and who should know that this is likely to cause a lot of problems in the future, such as health problems and with sex and movement etc.’

A flood of comments on the post advised the woman to end the relationship (photo)

A flood of comments on the post advised the woman to end the relationship (photo)

A flood of comments on the post advised the woman to end the relationship (photo)

However, others advised the woman to give the relationship more time – adding that the problem with her partner’s weight may not be permanent.

“I don’t agree with anyone saying to cut your losses at this stage,” one person wrote. ‘You are still in the early stages. You cannot know whether this is a permanent situation or, as you say, related to his recent hard times.

“Perhaps he has slipped into unhealthy habits that are easy to break. You say you still have some to lose, so maybe (if this gets worse) both of you can adopt a healthier lifestyle – taking long walks, eating healthy, etc.”

The person further advised the woman to give it more time and see how it develops because he seems’otherwise perfect’ – adding it would be a shame to ‘don’t give it a chance’.

Another wrote: ‘I think you’re thinking about it. Just take it for a week at a time and watch your relationship progress. If you like someone, you like them and that’s the main thing. I would go with the flow and enjoy it!

The size of a man is neither here nor there for me… in fact, I like a big bear of a man.”

Others told the woman she needs to see how the relationship goes, because her partner's weight problems may go away

Others told the woman she needs to see how the relationship goes, because her partner's weight problems may go away

Others told the woman she needs to see how the relationship goes, because her partner’s weight problems may go away

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